I don’t personally identify as neurodiverse, so I don’t really know what that word means, but in the past 12 months, it sure has come up a lot. Have I been living under a rock? Or is this actually starting to show up more? Last year, we noticed our then-3-year-old was a bit different from other kids. He has a bizarrely accurate memory. He asks
Thank you for sharing your experiences here Jay. The world would be amazing if we all focused on belonging and seeing the unique shine of every person. AND, if we gave people grace to grow and develop at their own pace.
When my kids were each 4, it looked like:
K would be a brilliant and obsessive neurotic, disinterested in connection with others
A would be an imaginative socialite, unconcerned with learning, big ideas or the issues of the world
W would be a gifted athlete but poor communicator, prone to physical altercations and alienating those he most wanted to be liked by.
At 30, 30, and 25 years old now - I can tell you how it all turned out. Beautifully.
K is still brilliant, and has a small circle of incredible friends and a lovely fiancee. He is an incredibly caring son and brother.
A is still socially magnetic, and graduated top of her class in a challenging college studying Environmental Science.
W is still a sensualist, very much in the body, and his sensitivity makes him an incrediblly feeling and empathic friend.
We need to nurture all aspects of our little ones, focus on their gifts, and allow them to integrate and celebrate all parts of themselves. Giving them grace also reminds us to extend that to ourselves.
Thanks Jay! As I read your story I smiled. It is so comforting to know that everyone, everything, everyday I encounter is just a way of navigating this world.
Thank you for sharing your experiences here Jay. The world would be amazing if we all focused on belonging and seeing the unique shine of every person. AND, if we gave people grace to grow and develop at their own pace.
When my kids were each 4, it looked like:
K would be a brilliant and obsessive neurotic, disinterested in connection with others
A would be an imaginative socialite, unconcerned with learning, big ideas or the issues of the world
W would be a gifted athlete but poor communicator, prone to physical altercations and alienating those he most wanted to be liked by.
At 30, 30, and 25 years old now - I can tell you how it all turned out. Beautifully.
K is still brilliant, and has a small circle of incredible friends and a lovely fiancee. He is an incredibly caring son and brother.
A is still socially magnetic, and graduated top of her class in a challenging college studying Environmental Science.
W is still a sensualist, very much in the body, and his sensitivity makes him an incrediblly feeling and empathic friend.
We need to nurture all aspects of our little ones, focus on their gifts, and allow them to integrate and celebrate all parts of themselves. Giving them grace also reminds us to extend that to ourselves.
"But he’s not a problem. He’s a human being." Beautiful and inspiring post.
Thanks Jay! As I read your story I smiled. It is so comforting to know that everyone, everything, everyday I encounter is just a way of navigating this world.
Always look forward to hearing from you :D
loved this! especially hearing about how your own experiences spilled over into your role as parent
Overwhelm is an ubiquitous behavior. I think it was Kierkegaard who said anxiety is the price we pay for freedom. Neurocompliant people are boring.